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Thursday, December 27, 2012

Neologism: "Independent" Mothers

Not long ago, the term "choice mothers" was introduced into the lexicon, to denote those (usually UMC white) women who pursue man-not-included reproduction, sometimes as a political statement and quite often to cheers of "u-go-grrl" from the Team Woman cheerleading squad, dancing and shaking their pom-poms over the graves of their child(ren)'s mental, social, moral, and academic development. Strangely, I actually liked this term, for it can be easily and etymologically accurate to apply this term to all situations where female choice--ever the priority of our culture--produces mothers who raise children on their own, without the active interference (but not, incidentally, without the resources) of a man. Thus "choice mommy" applies equally corectly to not only the well-to-do women who selfishly deny their child a resident bio father through IVF and sperm donation, but also to those who selfishly evict the father of their children from the home with the gleeful (and interest-conflicted) assistance of a legal and social system that awards them cash, prizes, and sympathy for doing so.

Now along comes "independent mothers", an oxymoron if there ever was one, in an attempt to re-brand those heroic lasses who just can't seem to get a break from all the judgementalism wrt their selfish behavior:
Was "single mother" really so stigmatizing? Of course not. It was scrupulously nonjudgmental, having been purged of the unpleasant echo of "marriage" that still hovers around the now-archaic term "unwed mother." And while the phrase "single mother" may have been value-neutral, the culture around it operated overtime to celebrate the "strong women" who were raising their children solo and to obliterate from public consciousness the males who regrettably still played a role in reproduction. The iron-clad rule in the MSM has been: When writing about single mothers, one must never, ever ask: Where are the fathers of their children? Male parents of poor children have simply been disappeared from mainstream discourse, too irrelevant to even think about.

And yet, apparently, there was still too much suggestion of deficit in the phrase "single mother." Someone, somewhere, has decided that another rebranding was in order. If single mothers are "independent," then married mothers are "dependent." Marriage is thus a detraction from the ideal feminist state and signifies participation in a compromising, patriarchal institution.  
Of course, so-called "independent mothers" are far more likely to be dependent on welfare and other forms of public assistance than married "dependent" mothers, but substituting a government check for a father has never troubled feminists and their supporters in the Democratic party. Biological fathers are of slight importance to the raising of children, after all, and the larger the welfare state, the more employment for crucial members of the Democratic base.
Like the author, I give this term good odds of survival to maturity. Just as "unwed mother" successfully marginalized "single mother" and now "choice mother", and framed / shaped the public debate ever since, we can look forward to the language police ensuring none of the archaic forms survive, and the Orwellian term "independent mother" become the new approved label that manages to mask both the dependence and, chances are, the selfish behaviors of the woman to whom the term is applied.

4 comments:

fschmidt said...

Calling an unwed mother an "independent mother" is like calling an orphan an "independent child".

wanderling said...
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ray said...

Of course, so-called "independent mothers" are far more likely to be dependent on welfare and other forms of public assistance than married "dependent" mothers, but substituting a government check for a father has never troubled feminists and their supporters in the Democratic party.


hasn't troubled the Republican Party either

i've been waiting half a century for ANY objection from the "conservatives" to the western Fempire and the annihilation of fatherhood, and all the Repubs do is stuff their pockets with money, buy cool new trucks, and babble about guns

the destuction of fatherhood by Team Woman and all their proxy institutions is not a result of abstract and uncontrollable environmental factors, but a concerted and conscious effort to eradicate fatherhood and maleness, while calling it all Equality and Protecting Vulnerable Woman

it is this world -- and soon, this universe -- that needs the protection . . . FROM Woman, her unbelievable selfishness, hatred, and pathologies, and the cowardly and weak men who cave in to her evil

cheers

wanderling said...
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